Thursday 11 September 2008

Glum

For those of you who have been kind of enough to enquire, YES, I'm still here. Just not writing much.

I could attribute my continuing silence to the back-to-school frenzy, or the fact that my mother is visiting, but that isn't the whole story. I seem to be fretting quite a lot, and that doesn't seem to be much in the spirit of be drunkenness. However, to quote Nina Simone, It Be's That Way Sometime.

I'm worried about Hurricane Ike -- and all of the friends who might be affected by it.

I'm terribly sad for Brave Sir Robin, who is dealing with a family tragedy.

I'm incredulous, bemused, angered and just plain anxious about the Palin/McCain team. I've been reading Jane Smiley's latest, Ten Days in the Hills, and it is bringing up all of the old angry feelings from the spring of 2003 -- when Washington declared war on Iraq -- and the fall of 2004, when Bush got re-elected. I wish that I could maintain a sense of humor about the U.S. election, but I'm starting to get all strident and ranty again.

Hopefully, someday soon, I will be able to focus again on thoughts life-affirming. Tomorrow I am going to Bath to see Vanessa Redgrave perform in The Year of Magical Thinking, and perhaps this study of grief will snap me out of my funk.

19 comments:

Audrey said...

I know how you feel. I read the Joan Didion book "The Year of Magical Thinking" and let's just say it ain't exactly upbeat. I'm sure Vanessa Redgrave will be superb. I'm frantic about this bloody election. Call me when your mom leaves and let's do lunch. Chin up, and all that.

TBM said...

Hope you get some quiet "Bee" time soon. I just started S+S--I needed a happy ending :-)

Have fun in Bath!

Beth said...

You have the right perspective - your blog is there for you when you are inspired to write.
How I envy you seeing Vanessa Redgrave in The Year of Magical Thinking! An amazing, wonderful book.

Elizabeth said...

Dear Bee
and other women who are horrified by Sarah Palin as all intelligent women are
go to
womenagainstsarahpalin.blogspot.com
and you will find lots of women who are really sad and frightened.
I'm coming to England for 2 weeks next Wednesday and am preparing for wet weather.
Have you discovered Persephone Books?

Brave Sir Robin said...

Bee-

I have a feeling when fall comes around you'll be right back in the swing of things.

Meanwhile, you are doing a fabulous job of keeping me sane.

Cindy said...

Here's a big HUG coming your way. Things will brighten up for you soon.

Sarah Laurence said...

Poor Bee, you do sound in a funk. I bet it's grey and rainy too. I'm very jealous about you seeing Venessa Redgrave act. That will be the silver lining to your cloud. I'm sending you a virtual hug.

Lucy said...

Glad you're still about and keeping us posted. Sounds like much to be glum about. I'm off to visit Elizabeth's women against Sarah P. blog to gain some more sense of solidarity.

I'm afraid Vanessa Redgrave wouldn't cheer me up too much but I hope she does it for you!

Anonymous said...

Bee,

Is this possible that this is a daylight problem, I note that often one might get into a "dark and leaden skies" mode of thought just after the Solstice.Our daughter has this as a major issue and since we bought her a 'light lamp' designed to give her more daylight hours she can actually function better, my husband spends his entire life looking for the sun. Perhaps a thought... and certainly a suggestion.

Regarding the Palin VP appointment, I am Brit for those that haven't guessed :)but have watched American politics feverishly since 1979 watching every State of the Union Address etc and have plowed my way through the TV Anchors, CNN, Fox etc and have had opinions not just from a global pespective but also in a effort to be balanced and try to understand what happens inside the U.S ( as indeed what happens in the States affects us all) I generally keep these thoughts/opinions to myself except in a small group.I find American politics exciting and dynamic. I am appalled however at this appointment. In order not to carry into a rant ( I have just deleted one to save you Bee the length)and in order to keep this blog clean I will just leave it all there.

Forgive me for intruding BSR but wherever your tragedy lies my very best wishes go to you as one stranger to a next.

Bee said...

Audrey,
Strangely enough, death can put it all into perspective. The emphasis on the fact that life can change in an instant helps me enjoy the moment more.
Lunch, definitely. I look forward to some hollering and preaching to the choir!

JAPRA,
There is a lot of bad news about at the moment. I can see why you are reaching for a comfort book.
(And by the way, we did have lots of fun in Bath!)

Beth,
We were right on the front row of the Theatre Royal in Bath, and I could see every expression on Redgrave's face. As you would assume, she was magnificent! She spoke continuously for 100 minutes, and her immersion in the role was total. I felt so fortunate to see her.

Elizabeth,
I looked up Persephone books, and I am going to make a little trip up to the Kensington store in the next few weeks. Thank you for telling me about it! Thanks, too, for the blog suggestion; I will check it out.
Where will you be in England? Today the weather was glorious, so hopefully it will be Indian summerish for your visit.

BSR,
I know you're right: I've just been out of my routine for too long.
(And if I have helped you at all, I am so glad.)

Thanks, Cindy.

Sarah,
I'll be in touch as soon as my mother leaves. Meanwhile, we are on the road again -- tomorrow, to Oxford! I will say hello to the place for you!

Lucy,
I think that I may have to break my intention (if not actually a vow) to not talk about politics in this blog. I am really interested in what you think about the Palin problem and all it suggests/represents.

As for Vanessa, it is cheering to see someone age naturally and still look beautiful.

DBeat,
Yes, I think that my funk was largely due to the relentless rain! Funnily enough, I feel much better now that the sun is shining. Goodness knows that there isn't good news on the TV to cheer one up.

I look forward to your contributions on the future Palin discussion.

Nimble said...

Hi Bee, I’m so glad to hear from you, even if it’s just a little grumble. I will offer the certainty that your feelings will change. But of course I don’t know when or why. Here’s hoping your spirits will be lifted soon and for a long time. I know that you’ll fall in love with a new book (or books) soon.

I’m trying to remain philosophical about the presidential race. There is a lot of sniping going on (on both sides) that I want nothing to do with. If nothing else, we can certainly agree that this is not a *boring* election.

After five inches of rain last week, moisture pushed north by Ike I gather, it finally let up on Saturday afternoon. I went for an after dinner walk with my family in the neighborhood and on the way back, in the sunset light, we saw the biggest brightest rainbow I have ever seen. It was a complete arc with a faint double bow outside the bright layer. It was a wonderful thing to see. The rainbow and the fact that our roof patch held through all that pouring rain relieved my mood.

Anne said...

My goodness, you do have a knack for putting down in writing what I've been experiencing myself. Like you, I've been in a bit of a funk, and there doesn't seem to be much worth writing. I'm glad you had a good time in Bath--I'm so envious of your getting to see Vanessa Redgrave!--and hope you're feeling less fretful these days. Hope the sun continues to shine for you!

herhimnbryn said...

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Lucy said...

Bee, thanks for your visit. It was largely this post of yours that made me realise how low and oppressed my spirits were about much of this, and that I was rather avoiding my blog as a result. Even if it is a very small risk to air our feelings we feel nervous about taking it, but the responses I got cheered me somewhat, if not about the matter of the elections but at least about most of my readers!

Dave King said...

I think probably most of us are sharing your feelings to some extent. Difficult to know how best to react to them, but these are not pleasing times, that's for sure.

Bee said...

Nimble,
My mood is much improved this week, and only a lack of time (now) keeps me from blogging. My mom leaves on Saturday and I hope to be getting back to normal -- in terms of putting thoughts on the page. I AM grateful that I don't have to suffer through the onslaught on constant commercials for the presidential race. At least I can pick and choose what I read.

Anne,
It's interesting how certain thoughts/worries seem to render all other thoughts/activities rather pointless. I had wanted to write more about our France holiday, and perhaps someday I will, but at the moment it just seems irrelevant -- if you know what I mean.

Lucy,
THANK YOU. I was really cheered by your post (and the reader responses) as well. It is comforting to share this sort of worry, I think, even if I want (in general) to avoid strident politicizing.

Dave,
No, they are not pleasing times! It is really quite frightening to think of Sarah Palin being president. (Thanks for stopping by!)

Anonymous said...

I only discovered your blog recently and I do hope that soon spirit will be uplifted enough for some more posts! Certainly there's little present comfort to be taken politically, here or in the States. But, as wily old British PM Harold Wilson said back in the '60s, a week is a long time in politics. Much may change yet

Bee said...

Dick,
I hope to be back on writing track this week -- thanks for visiting me!
We mustn't lose hope that the Palin halo will tarnish with time. In the meantime, there is a lot of good writing to be read on the subject. I just hope her fans are reading.

Alyson | New England Living said...

I get how you feel and we all go through it from time to time, though it doesn't help to hear that one you're in the middle of it.